PostSecrets That I Desperately Want To Send In

I keep meaning to send in some PostSecrets...some in the hope that they'll make it to the right person...so here are the ones I want to do.

Whenever I pet a golden retriever…
I think of you and Jaffy…
And I smile a small, sad smile.

I’ll still wait…
But you can come back now.
The door is open and the porch light on.

I like this school…
But tickets are too damn expensive
For when I need an escape.

I’ve worked with hundreds of kids.
Out of those, I have seen about 5 children that make me want my own
And just a handful of parents that I admire and respect.
Parents: your actions have consequences…just look at your little hellions.

You are too easy.
I don’t need to convince you (me) of my worth…
And consequently, you bore me.
How sick is that?

George Anderson:
I’ve waited a long time for you…
What if you’re a lie?

We’re done…
But occasionally a part

of me cares

What Should I Do Then?

"Don't Judge A Book By It's Cover"

If that's the title for your photo album and these are the photos you're sharing...what the hell should I judge you on?

Hello...hello....hello!

Hmm so these reoccurring thoughts and dreams are starting to get a little obnoxious. I mean hell...it's already been a year since we truly dated...why am I still hung up on Mr. Ryan?

You all know my poor little tale of woes...yes, it's pathetic. Yes, I made a blubbering fool of myself Saturday night...and no, alcohol was not included.

I find myself in strangely nostalgic moods lately. Not just for Ryan even! Why am I missing Mark as well?

Here's my hypothesis: I see Andrew so infatuated with Liliane...and I miss that emotional connection. Yes, I enjoy the physical aspects of the fun I'm having currently. That being said, I miss cuddling up with Ryan and knowing it meant something. I miss being goofy with Hunter - running hand in hand. I miss being able to cry on Mark.

I don't really get those opportunities with Rox. I'm simply another asset to his 'household'. It's fine but I have, and always will, crave that emotional intimacy.

Here's to what was and what is yet to be. Staci - you damn well better be correct about George and UPS!

The 'Thing'

See here's the thing...life is really good.

I have incredible friends. Sure, I've had the opportunity to remember who my true friends are lately, but why is that so bad? It's actually a bit of a favor that she's done. These friends that I have...are some of the most selfless, giving, accepting people in the world - and I'm not just saying that because I'm biased. I firmly believe it. Therefore, here are some thank yous to those closest to me and those who've been there for me lately.

T: what in the world would I do without you? This has been a trying time for the both of us but the amount of support you've provided for me is unbelievable. I can't wait to come home to you, the Condo, our meeting at UPS, Target and Basil Thai adventures, etc. You are a true spirit and need to know that whomever manages to prove himself to you is beyond lucky. Do not settle. Take this opportunity to explore yourself, your world, your passions, your hates, etc. Someone had better work damn hard to get you.

Thank you for your unfaltering support - especially throughout the last 5 years. I can never thank you enough.

J: your empathy means so much to me. I cherish the knowledge that I can tell you anything and be confident that you won't judge me. Very few people are that amazing. You always see the best in me and, consequently, I strive to live up to your opinion of me. I've gotta say, that 'high regard' is one of only a few things keeping me from completely unleashing. I refuse to stoop that low - thank you for being my personal cheer squad both with this and with every other thing in my life.

Roomies: acceptance doesn't come often. I do my best to be a good person; to make good decisions. I appreciate your ability to see that in me. Plus, let's be honest, I love that I can vent and curse stuff out with you and hear your cursing just as loud. I know I can always count on your loyalty...oh and your yummy food too ;) Of course!

B: I'm so thrilled that we've been able to hang out. I've missed you tons and am so grateful to your hubby for inviting me to your party. More than that, I'm blessed to have you back in my life. I only hope that I can, in some small way, add to your life as well. Please, if there's anything you ever need, don't hesitate to ask. You know I'd do it in a heartbeat. You are a truly amazing woman and I'm thrilled for you on...exciting things. :D

A: I'm saddened by the fact that you're leaving soon. You have no idea how much I value the chance to vent to you. Knowing that someone is there with me helps out a lot. It's hard right now...you know why...but I'm grateful for our midnight talks and that exchange of knowing looks the next morning. You are an incredible individual. Refuse to let titles define you. Whatever happens, you will be able to handle it.

Parents: it's been a long time coming but you're finally becoming my friends and not just parents. I doubt that many people have such an open and equal relationship with their parental unit and I feel quite fortunate for that terrible family therapy that brought us together. Thank you for being ok with my 2am calls...my need for independence, the crazy price of my school, etc. You truly are magnificent.

That is all. I am blessed. I am honored to have such a rich and full life. I plan on remembering how fortunate I am every day and, as much as I can, help to enrich someone else's life - regardless of the form that takes. I'm starting with you. I won't go there. There's the stark contrast.

Dear God, It's Me...Devon

What is it about human nature that requires us to continually want something better...bigger...more beautiful..etc?

I don't like being 21. I want to be 25. I want to be 25, happily together with George, being awesome at my job, buying a house, able to rent a car...fabulously me.

How come everyone around me is busy getting married? Having kids?

Sure, being single is fun...and I'd much rather be single than in a relationship that sucks. God - I see far too many of those around too. Here's the thing though...I'm impatient. I want it all now. Of courseeeeee it'll be perfect...I'll be 25. I'll be amazing. I won't cry, won't feel stressed, won't get angry. Something like that, right?

Blah.

If I had someone to do it with me though....a person to cuddle up with at night. A person who's puppy makes walking to the bathroom in the middle of the night impossible without licks. A person who puts on Finding Nemo for me. A person who occasionally lets me into his inner-workings...a secret place I feel few get to witness. A person who carries me to bed where we proceed to eat strawberry popsicles.

What are you doing tonight? Are you watching tv with Jaffy? Are you having a beer with a buddy? Working on your bike? Doing laundry? Already passed out? Making burritos?

Why are you not texting me? Why are you not opening the door a bit? Each day it gets harder to resist the urge to call you...reach out...

You haunt my dreams, plague my driving...and overwhelm my emotions - over and over.

Please...I need to feel your arms around me again...revel in your comfort and contentment. Just let me know when - I'll only ever wait for you...but it sure as hell doesn't mean I want to have to wait.

I Want...

So I'm starting to design the look for my new apartment..yes, I know it's a year off but still!

Here's what I'm thinking: I want a red bedroom. So far I've done green and blue. Now I think it's time for a touch o' red. Here are ideas

From there, I think I want my bathroom to inherit some of my bedroom decor from the 'blue phase'.

Oh for the day when this is the place I call home...with two kitties of course...and lots of blankies.

Win/Win vs. Win/Lose vs. Lose/Lose

So apparently life is one competition after another and sore losers are plentiful.

Some people play solitaire - playing out their competitions with themselves.

Some people wrestle - fighting to the death against a single other person.

Some people are in the ice hockey rink - waiting for a fight so all hell can break lose.

There's a lot of shoddy techniques involved in these games. Everyone gets fouls...some just more than others.

I'm not big on the 'game' and 'competition' ideas but, out of the three, I normally play solitaire. I'm only responsible for myself - why try to control others? It gets frustrating to see the 'sideline coach' syndrome...

"No, Billy - go that way!"

"Sam hit him - illegal!"

Get a grip people...deal with yourselves...if everyone did that, we'd all be much better off.

The Almighty 'But'

I'm having a grand time exploring myself and all that jazz...but here's the thing. If you asked me to come over...I'd drop it all...in a fucking heartbeat. Please...

I know my role in your life is a little different than what I'd like for it to be...but I'll be patient as I have been in the past. Eventually, I trust that you'll open the door a bit again...and I can feel whole...not whole perhaps...but more content.

I can curl up with you on your opium bed.
I can hug Jaffy tons and tons.
I can tell you to be good at work.
I can have races with you.
I can cuddle with you in bed.
I can get my hair silky-smooth in your shower.
I can be Mine...and you can be Dink.

I'll be here...k? Just let me know...

Limbo Lows

In the words of a great show: "seriously?!...seriously?!"

I've got to say...I did not see this coming. There are lows that are understandable, forgivable, whatever...then there are lows that are just trashy and reflect badly on the person doing the lowering.

Like I talked about in my last post, I'm finally to a point where I'm doing things for me. As selfish as it sounds, I truly am the most important person in my life. I can't help or be there for anyone else if I'm not taking care of myself first.

So here I am, exercising my right and I suppose it's understandable that it may not rub well with some people. That's ok - everyone's entitled to their own opinions. It becomes a bit of an issue when my choices are kicked through the mud and twisted.

The thing is, for the first time (gotta love firsts) I don't care. This is my life and, damn-it, I'll live it as I please.

It's time for a wild ride but I'm ever so excited...and that's truly all that counts.

Me

Here's the thing...I like my life.

I have a loving and supportive family.
I have a few true friends that I know I can count on for anything - no matter when.
I like my school when I'm not stressed with tests and papers.
I like my work when I'm not wanting to down a few shots.
I like where I volunteer and I love the feeling I get from doing so.

I've finally come to realize that the only person I'm stuck with forever is me...so I might as well do things that I enjoy, can learn from, and truly wish to experience.

It's hard for me to let go of opinions...assumptions from other people...glares, etc.

The thing is...I'm not stupid. I think things through. I weigh consequences against actions. I am not inept nor ignorant...and don't appreciate being accused of it.

You may not agree with everything I do but who are you to judge me? Somehow I feel as if you might have other things to deal with. Why worry yourself with me? That's what I do.

I'm finally doing things for me. It's an incredible feeling. If I don't want to see someone, I won't. If I don't want to accept the judgement of someone, I'll walk away and realize I'm better off for it.

I am my own master and what I choose to do is mine and mine alone.

Open your mind, accept others, and focus on the one thing you can control - yourself.

Better Late Than Never...

So I gave a talk at the EDA group at the CFC tonight...I'd totally blanked on agreeing to do it and ended up not at all prepared.

I rambled on for a bit about recovery, where I'd been, where I've gotten to...and, about 10 minutes after I left, I found the words that I'd meant to say.

I talked about how life was easier, fabulous, etc. In actuality though, it's not necessarily easier or more fabulous - rather just different. Instead of worrying about weight, calories, secrets, etc., I'm finally worrying about normal 21 year old stuff.

I focus on:

• school stress
• why that one boy didn't call
• how to make more money
• when to take the GRE and how to study
• which restaurant or club to go to
• pros and cons of roommates

I'm in a place where my stressors and hardships are normal...relatable...and dealable. After being through the hell I have, I know that pretty much anything is manageable - as shitty as it might feel at the time.

I guess you could say I'm grateful for my worries in a weird, twisted way.

...Never thought I'd say that though...hah.

Dreams

You and your mom starred in my dreams last night. I woke up missing you more than I have in a while.

Someday, ok? K.

Buffet Table

I often get the feeling that my mind is a buffet table...so random...so much stuff that isn't good for me and so much that I crave. Does that make sense? Meh who knows.

Let's figure out what is on the table tonight....

Double Chocolate Fudge Cake -

- my thoughts are thick, heavy, and totally overwhelming. Not to mention deliciously decadent. I'm exploring an area that I've been intrigued by for a while but haven't had the opportunity to discover. Now is different though. It's not 'in the norm' and quite frankly I'm proud of it. I'm loving everything that I'm learning, truly experiencing every sensation, and craving more and more.

Perhaps my cake has a red velvet layer as well...seeing as how my hair has a red layer too! Strange...and kind of a dare...but I'm thrilled to have done it and to see what he says...ooh la la - scandalous.

Diet Dr. Pepper and Strawberry Popsicles -

Umm...I miss Ryan...a lot. The loss and longing hits unexpectedly and occasionally becomes debilitating. I know my role in his life...his role in mine...but I sure as hell wish it wasn't that way. I want cuddle time with Dink...I want giggles, walks, Japhy, just being...

I haven't found anyone that compares to him yet...and it's bothering me.

Why hasn't he contacted me? My blanket is still in his house... My shampoo and conditioner waiting to make me silky smooth in his shower. The toys I got Japhy are there too. Bullet, a random shirt, toothbrush, etc.

.
Ichiban Noodles and Pineapple

My Tina is coming to visit! Granted, it's not under the happiest of circumstances but I'm absolutely thrilled to have her here. We shall have mucho fun and I've got a done of secret stuff planned to help the happiness levels go up.

Alright...now I'm just hungry. Let's be done with the buffet.

Skip And A Hop Down Memory Lane

Let's review, shall we?

July 4th, 2005: I was busy kicking it in a place of hope and healing. We went to a parade...in Orem...and watched Batman Begins. Overall rating: 2...I was also in oodles of pain.

July 4th, 2006: Errr who knows...

July 4th, 2007: Drove back from Cannon Beach, Oregon with Mark. Spent the evening resenting Mr. Welch for giving Mark a beer. It also involved Marble Slab and cake. Weeee.

July 4th, 2008: Watched tons of fireworks, spent the night at a cabin up on a lake, watched a small town parade, worked a booth for 10,000 Villages, rode a horse...almost died, swam, and had a fabulous time.

July 4th, 2009: Hmmmm guess you'll have to check back tomorrow evening. :D

Don't. Do. It.

Oooops too late!

Don't you hate when you give in to those things that you know you shouldn't and, of course, end up having it come back and blow up in your face?

Hey, me too!

Perhaps you finally gave in and weighed yourself.

Perhaps you ventured up into your over-flowing attic.

Perhaps...well...who knows.

What did I do? Oh ya know, looked at Ryan's facebook page. Now one might ask why that is such a big deal. Yup, I'm asking that too. Whatever the reason, looking at Ryan's page usually results in the following:

• shuffling around and feeling sorry for myself.
• looking more.
• thinking about the past.
• and, as the climax to the story, dreaming about him.

Weeeee good times to be sure. Ryan and his soul-pal thing are starting to annoy me. Oh, when do I get my blanket back anyways? hmmmmm

Red Alert

Today was one of those days I'm glad only come around rarely (fingers crossed). Life and I have had quite a good relationship lately. We laugh together, hold hands, eat french toast, etc. It's really quite cute. Today...today things turned ugly. Mucho ugly.

Within an hour I went from totally fine to in hyper freak-out mode. Suddenly I was Madeline and everything was not right...it was quite wrong! Here's the kicker though...I knew that my thoughts were entirely irrational. In fact, I could create very logical and probable reasons for what I was anxious about. It didn't seem to matter though. What has subsequently bothered me slightly more than those fears themselves...is the fact that I'm not entirely sure as to what set it all off. That's a scary scary feeling to not know why you're feeling a certain way.

For the first time in a long time, I did not want to be around me. I didn't feel so fabulous knowing that I had to sit with myself...confused...and upset. See...normally, if a car breaks down and you don't know why, you can get out of the car, send it off to someone to fix, and not have to deal with it. Not quite the same when it's yourself.

Definitely a weird day and while my concerns have neither been confirmed or gotten rid of, I feel slightly more in control of myself. Hooray for that and hooray for continuing to work on creating a 'self' that I can stand to be around for the rest of my life ;)

To help, I spent the evening with Jenna and we ate num-nums and I tried on Anthropologie dresses because that always always always makes me feel better...and it did :)

Epic Fails Of The Male Race

I would like to file a formal complaint...against whom? Boys of the world...those dick-ish, stupid, think with the wrong head boys.

One might ask what has me all riled up...I'm here to tell you about just a few small examples of the masses of idiotic things 'boys' have accomplished over the eons of time. Let's start at the beginning shall we?

Adam...of Adam and Eve...I'm pretty sure he was the one who munched on a yummy apple. It's always the guys messing things up of course.

King Henry VIII...while deliciously hot in The Tudors...kind of a douche in his time. Beheading is not so nice. Just saying. Neither is banishing...

Hitler...serious issues...liked to pee on girls...creepy...among other things

George Bush (Jr. and Sr.) Copy-catting names of an idiot man to his son never turns out well. Exhibit A:...nuff said

South Carolina Senator, Mark Sanford - Argentinian affair...don't cry for me. (If anyone gets that you've made my day)


Have I made my case yet? No, here are more details of interest:

Women live longer than men...why? So that we have a few years of sanity at the end.

Kids...they come out of women (gross, btw) why? Guys whine too much and are just generally less pleasant to be around when grumpy.

Men usually maintain short hair and only shave their faces (if at all)...why? They can't be trusted with a razor or a haircut that requires more than 5 seconds of effort. Please see clothing choices as well.


Point made.


Let's discuss the idiotic boys that wander aimlessly around my life. I'd like to spotlight a personal favorite this evening for closer inspection. Friends, may I present Mark...in all his cocky, little boy power-struggle glory...or gory? Both...yes both.

Here's a little background for ya:
As you might know, I have recently returned from an epic (in every sense of the word) trip to England and Ireland. I was not, in the least attracted, attracted to the friend (guy) that I went to see.

Mark texted me last night to inquire how I was doing (a likely story of course). I informed him of the fabulous summer I've been having and he proceeded to ask when I was leaving for Europe...already happened. His next question...So did you sleep with him? Just wondering... Since when has that ever been an appropriate thing to ask someone...an ex that you're trying to woo back no less?

The only redeeming moment of that entire interaction was the fact that I responded by informing him that, regardless of the answer, it was simply none of his business.


Ladies, I could certainly go on to discuss a myriad of other stupid boy stories but, for the sake of time and sanity, I shall cease now...one must pace out these delicious stories of absurdity after all.

MHA (Man Haters Anonymous)

So I'm in a hating mood. My dearest Amanda returned from her home sweet home this evening. Clifford was upstairs after having picked her up and I asked him if he wouldn't mind sending Amanda up when she had a second. He asked to which I replied that I wanted to see if she could pick me up from the airport. Here's where the hating started:

Cliff: "Oh, yeah she'll be able to pick you up."

Devon: "Let me just ask...I'd much rather she make that decision for herself."

Cliff: "Well she's just out of class so she can do it."

Devon: "What if she doesn't want to? Let's just ask her."


Seriously Cliff.... How is it ever appropriate to speak for your girlfriend? I'm quite tired of his patronizing nonsense towards me. Contrary to popular belief, I already have a daddy who's quite adept at providing the daddy worries and questions. I absolutely have no need for my roommate's boyfriend...who is only around because of his attachment to his girlfriend...to give me lectures on my choices.

Alright, that's all. This was a small rant...but a rant nonetheless. Here's to putting the silly boys in their places...

The 'M' Word

Alright...let's assess. Perhaps it's just because I'm in Utah...or that I know a large number of Mormons. Seriously though people - what's with getting hitched? I mean, hell, we're barely in our 20's (some of us at least...) and we're already donning the white dress, crazy amounts of hairspray, and plastering smiles on.

Let's not deny the fact that yes, occasionally I wouldn't mind being one of those girls with the long veils. This desire is tamed by the knowledge of several things:

• Studies show that marriages at younger ages have higher divorce rates.



• I have a hell of a lot left to explore and play around with.



• I refuse to settle.



• I really need to live on my own before settling down.



• I like my personal space and life. Hell, I love going to bed alone and being able to sprawl out.



• If I really need the white pretty dress, that's what pretending and going to wedding stores is for...as is the jewelry store game that I've perfected with several friends.

I think we're used to hearing about the magic of weddings, honeymoons, etc. We've all heard about the honeymoon effect as well. Plus, if we're going to get down to it, there are a lot of benefits that go out the window once you get hitched.

• Using the parentals' insurance is gone.



• Personal time/space is nixed.



• Friends? What friends?



• Is it ok to skip a day of showering...probably not...now someone else has to smell you too.



• If you sleep with someone, you can't play solitaire on your ipod as easily.



• Guys snore.



• When can you have a good cry?

See what I'm saying? Yes, getting married will be an incredible occasion...in 7 years. I have so much growing up and learning to do. For now, I'll look at pictures of wedding dresses and fantasize about colors and themes...and take comfort that I don't have to worry about money, grumpy in-laws, and a cold-footed groom. Ah the joys of imagination.

.

White Pants and Chocolate Milk

Word to the wise - when drinking Horizon Organic Chocolate Milk, never ever squeeze the container. One ends up with a face and shirt full of chocolate milk and, while pretty and funny, is not really at all.

In about 48 hours I hop on a couple of planes and end up in London. Kinda crazy right? I've never been before and let's be honest, am rather nervous about going. I'm one of those people who, a week before a big trip, flips out because they won't be in control, know their way around, etc. Yep - that's me! To combat this feeling of impending doom, I have done what any smart traveler does...buy a shit ton of junk food. Let's see...white cheddar popcorn, butterfingers, peanut butter m&ms, tropical starburts, and twizzlers. Not bad for about 21 hours on planes. I feel solid about it.

Of course I'll take oodles of pictures and post the good ones. I wouldn't be me if I didn't!

My dad made me watch Taken so now I know that it's a bad idea to tell cute french guys where I'm staying oh, and don't do drugs. It's always good to have a daddy who's kick ass at shooting a gun, scuba diving, etc. This means that if I'm stupid and get myself caught up in an Albanian prostitution ring, mon pere can come save me. Weeee.

Here's to a fabulous time in England and Ireland - complete with sleeping pills galore.

The 'Do's and Dont's' of Getting the Girl

Let's start with the bad news, shall we?

What NOT to do:

• text at early hours
• text repeatedly when I have not responded to the first one. You're coming on too strong and I'm already annoyed with you.
• stare at my chest and/or ass. I'm here fyi...
• make me feel expendable
• ask me if I'm having a fun time or if I'm ok over...and over...and over.
• poke and prod. If I want to talk, I will. Don't push me.
• talk about marriage on the first date. No, I will not be your sugar momma so that you can stay home and watch the kids...talk about disturbing.
• insult my political, ideological, social views. It's always a good plan to keep politics, capital punishment, abortion, suicide, diets, etc., off the table for as long as possible. Oh, and nix the exes. I don't care what Sarah or Amanda did that was terrible...or great. Just don't give a shit.
• ask me if you're 'good'...or how you compare with other guys. Annoying, impossible to answer, and fucked up in general.
• ask me for 'naughty' or 'dirty' pictures. It goes back to the whole respect concept...novel isn't it?
• be obliviously rude and degrading.

What TO Do To Win The Girl:

• come prepared with a general but flexible date plan.
• smell yummy
• look good...but not over the top. Show me that you've taken the time to make yourself presentable but not to the point where it looks like all you want is to get laid.
• please...whatever you do...don't try too hard. Desperate is a HUGE turn-off. It's time to realize this.
• Comment on something other than what I'm wearing...generally eyes or...hey! perhaps a personality trait!
• share yourself with me. Tell me what makes you special...don't brag though.
• attempt to be slightly intuitive...listen for cues. I'll give them.
• laugh
• admit your faults but show your strengths.
• like dogs and cats.
• cook.
• give amazing back rubs
• make me happy.

It may sound complicated but I promise, in the beginning, it's more about what NOT to do. Leave me intrigued. Suggest that I give You a call. It shows you have confidence in yourself and respect my decisions. Always a good combo. End the night with a good hug and a smile. Don't try for a kiss...don't try to gush to me about how much fun you've had. It should be apparent either way. Last but not least, don't ask me the night went for me...I'll let you know. Wait until the next day or the day after to text me.

So there you go, gentlemen. Read it and follow. Your chances with both me and basically any girl will improve exponentially if you do.

That's all for now. Be.

He's Just Not That Into You

Fabulous movie - even better message.Who the hell needs a guy, right? In all honesty, they can be fun at times but so annoying and aggravating most of the time. I have much more important things to do with my life than sit around petting egos, being the arm candy, the disposable toy.

For those of you who don't know, I've taken up dating like a guy. It's actually quite interesting. I'm by no means a pro, but it is a learning experience...that's for sure.

This blog will, for a short time at least, become rather like Secret Diary of a Call Girl. How so? A bit of a diary of the down and dirty. Mind you, nothing too risque...although very few people read this anyways ;)

Let's review how last night went:

8pm - met up with Dan. I had been promised a fabulous massage and was definitely let down. He's a bit of a cocky bastard and I don't anticipate seeing him again. I don't do cocky and I don't play his sort of games.

10pm - dropped Dan off and texted Kevin. I was on my way to the store for some yum yums but thought I'd give Kevin a try. As luck would have it, the sexy chef/army Sergeant happened to have made some delicious chicken Alfredo and rolls. Score for me. We hung out for a while, he wore his uniform (mmmm dirty) and then I got bored.

Kevin is one of those guys who asks for a kiss and we emerge 20 minutes later. He doesn't really understand (respect) the concept of a peck kiss. Let's be honest here...he was busy trying to please me...and I was thinking about a decent way to leave gracefully. He's a fairly talented guy, extra hot, army, cook, blah blah blah...but I dunno...a tad on the boring side. I'll keep him around though - he is sweet and does indeed mean well...in a physical way at least. Not sure he cares on the emotional level which is fine since I don't either ;)

Boys are silly creatures...they have a hard time balancing the chase with the extremes. I'm absolutely turned off by the guys waiting on my every move...and frustrated beyond words at those who play fucked up mind games. I'm going to let you in on a secret boys...girls like a bit of a chase. We want respect. We want teasing. We want cute little presents. We don't want to be smothered.

Hmmm this gives me material for another post: What to do and what not to do to get the girl:

As for the ending of this - here are some lyrics from my uber fabulous Jenna:

I am extraordinary, if you'd ever get to know me I am extraordinary, I am just your ordinary average every day sane psycho super-goddess